All Over the Place

The Power of Self-Compassion

I write in my journal, “Janell, it’s okay to be all over the place.”

This is literal and figurative, as I have been “all over the place.” In the past month, I flew to Kansas to welcome grandbaby boy Peter Kohn, our 4th grandbaby and 2nd son to Grant and Kristen. Isaac loves the dangle-bangle bead earrings I wear, so I’ve upped my game. I’ve come to realize they are little worry beads on my ears. I find myself running them through my hands—especially on the airplane rides.

And then flew to St. Louis to celebrate the upcoming birth of grandbaby, or grandbirds as I fondly call them, #5—a baby girl coming to Brooke and Aaron:

All Over the Place

“Because self-critics often come from unsupportive family backgrounds, they tend not to trust others and assume that those they care about will eventually try to hurt them. This creates a steady state of fear that causes problems in interpersonal interactions. For instance, research shows that highly self-critical people tend to be dissatisfied in their romantic relationships because they assume their partners are judging them as harshly as they judge themselves. The misperception of even fairly neutral statements as disparaging often leads to oversensitive reactions and unnecessary conflicts. This means that self-critics often undermine the closeness and supportiveness in relationships that they so desperately seek.”
― Kristin Neff, Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself

Choosing Self-Compassion Over Self-Criticism

I definitely live in a state of self-criticism.

I learned this skill well as I traversed my competitive years of dance and pageants.